I want to go back to high school

But minus all the awkwardness

There was a boy I liked, Daniel when I was 13/14. And he liked me back, and I knew this because he was one of the good ones and he told me. He was so open and honest sometimes, but then others he would be soo shy.

We knew that we liked each other, and the class knew that we liked each other.

Some of the notes we used to pass each other (so he not only said it, but I had it written as proof).

“I’m in language and its really boring. I’ve done 8 wordfinds. I can’t stop thinking about u!”

I got jealous at one stage because even though I knew he liked me, I still had doubts when girls in the class started saying ..”ooh he must like so and so” and that so and so wasn’t me.  So I asked him straight out. And instead of answer that absurd question he wrote back “r u tired bcos u’ve been running throu my mind all day”

haha I know, corny as, but hey, when you’re 14… ya know! He then asked why

“coz when u gave ***** ur jumper yesterday **** kept saying th@ it was so sweet and th@ u must really like her”
“No I just felt sorry 4 her. U no hu I like mab”
“mab?”
“mab! D’ya still like KG?”
“may I ask wot th@s got to do wiff it?”
“well no”
“oh ok then does it matta”
“maybe”
“oh i c umm…well”
“I would really like an answer”
“y?!!!!! I would pefer not to think about it”
“Fine den. NE way I don’t LIKE *****”
“ok ok calm down I’m sowwy its just that I’m not sure”

According to my diary that was a Friday. The next school day entry was the Monday that went…

“I spent all weekend worrying for nothing it seems. Today in science Daniel asked me again it I still liked Kieran. I hate when people ask me that sort of stuff. Anyway I said ‘I don’t know ok and I don’t wanna think about it.’ I asked why and he said ‘I think you know why.’ I wrote ‘jealous?’ and do you know what he wrote back? ‘course’ “

The Tuesday….

“….I wrote Daniel a note today and asked if that other chic he liked was at Papakura would he like her? and he said Nope the person I currently like is 10x better…”

Wednesday….

“Today in science* I was borrowing rulers for the test when ###### told me that Daniel knows that I like him but doesn’t believe it. So I got her to ask him why and he said something about me still liking Kieran. So I told him I didn’t even though I still do.  ***** reakons Daniel and I should go out but I know he won’t ask me and I won’t ask him. Totally pathetic but tru.”

Friday….

“Yesterday in Science when I was passing notes to Daniel I asked him how was and I he said “good I fink”. SO I asked him why and he said to ask ^^^^^^ but I said “why don’t you just tell me now? we have options 4th and 5th”
“ok den. Do u fink I don’t like u?”
“I neva sed th@”
“i no but do u think th@?”
“no y would I? don’t u?”
“I neva said dat!”
it was like a total opposite of Wednesday….”

Sunday…

“I was talking to &&&& and ###### yesterday on MSN and they both think that I should go out with Daniel. &&&& said that Daniel doens’t believe I like him because &&&& wanted to go out with me, but I know that it’s because of Kieran. I wish Daniel would just give up on that. I already told him I don’t like him anymore but he just doens’t listen. Anyway &&&& and ###### are both going to try and set me and Daniel up.”

Monday…

“He got so close to asking me out!! I just know it!!!!”

The rest to be continued… like a teenage tv drama

*I am starting to see now why my Science teacher said that I tended to use Science as a social occasion

I exisit, therefore I am….or something to that effect

I may have said before that I think I am getting a lil obsessed with sex. But this is really not a good run for me.

Over the weekend realiable lay was not so relaible. The people he lives with were home and awake when we didn’t want them to be. They had just got back from Australia the night before and so were on Aussie time 3 hours behind us here on New Zealand time.

So that didn’t work out. And then on a day he doesn’t usually have his son he was picking him up from after school care so couldn’t come and join our druggie/drinky party.

There was someone else I had been talking to who was going to come over this morning for a bit of fun before work…but it turns out he has a gf and he got the guilts. Now I’ll be honest. I wasn’t going there for a relationship so if they had an agreement that she was happy with I wouldn’t have minded coz that’s not what I was after with this particular guy. so anyway, that did not happen.

I haven’t spoken to Juicy Lips for a while. I wonder what he’s up to….

If I’m being totally honest, I would go for a sexless relationship with Crush (sexless for a small amount of time) over sex with Mr Reliable any day of the week.

I am so over boys right now

Crush has started ignoring me.

In fact he went so far as to delete my comments off his facebook page.

It makes me so sad because we were really good friends. We talked all the time and made each other laugh. And it’s more the loss of a friend than anything else that’s bugging me.

No actually, I know what’s bugging me. No explanation. No nothing. No… look I’m sorry but I think I should only talk to  you in relation to work. No… look I think it’s best if we don’t talk.

I just hate the cutoffness. It sucks.

All Blacks new Poster Boy

Unless you are in New Zealand or England, last nights game probably did not even register on your list of things to watch on a Saturday night – or even on your list of things to be bothered by. I, for example, love to watch the NZ NBL which I realize pales in comparison with the American League, but I can’t watch the American one.

So, last night we debuted another star. 19-year-old Richard Kahui, fresh faced and eager looked damn nervous during the national anthem, but was right there to pull his weigh throughout the entire game. When captain Richie McCaw was taken off due to an injury in the first half Kahui never faltered without the leadership of his captain. He followed Dan Carter’s beautiful set up with the first try of the game, although, some couch ‘refs’ had a couple of things to say about the way he put the ball down criticizing him for showing off, and not being more careful to make sure it wasn’t a ‘knock on during try’.
I gave him the benifit of the doubt. It’s you’re first international debute. You are allowed to make a few mistakes. He didn’t let anyone down for the rest of the game. After a particularly nasty head collision with an English player Kahui knelt down next to him to see if he was alright. This is the kind of sportsmanship that makes me proud to be a kiwi and to support our boys in Black. To be honest, even if he was an Aussie knocked down I’m sure he would have stooped to help. In saying that, I’m not sure if you have seen the Aussie team, but they are not built to be pretty. They are built solid and tough like tanks. I’m not sure they would be easily knocked down.
Already for such a young player I can see the potential that had him picked for the team. And I’m not an avid follower sure, so I think for me to pick this up he must be something extraordinary. And for me to write about it means something.

Well, that, and I am without a team to support in the NBL since the Auckland Stars were knocked out at the Semis. The Waikato Pistons took it out in the end which is great for them as they haven’t won since 2002.

Oh…and he’s pretty damn fine looking too…

This is the English guy before he and Kahui collided

and just after

Kahui? Got away with a tooth scratch across the forehead.